Friday, February 21, 2014

Life Lately

Life lately has been hard. I have been great at putting a nice big smile on for others to see but in all realness I am hurting. I am not sleeping well. I am crying at moments when I am alone and there is not a day that goes by I do not think about my nephew. 



I know as time goes I am going to get better but at this point, it is so damn hard that every day is hard. With the rest of my life, things are good. Country Couture is great, my husband is great, my family is great my friends are amazing, and work is great. Emotionally though I am hurting. I never expected to hurt so bad from the loss of someone. I don't know at this point how to even put into words how I feel. 

I shouldn't be able to google his name and find news reports about him. I shouldn't be able to see RIP before his name on his friends' post. There is a lot I should not be able to see at this point. I have my own regrets from what has happened. There are things I wish I did different but I can not change one thing. All I can do is fight for justice for him. 

I am not sleepy well and it is due to things coming up that I can not mention. I just pray for justice. Accident or no accident, something must be done. I lost something I can never get back.



6 comments:

  1. Rach, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your nephew. Sounds like it was a real tragedy. It's trite to say, but over time you will find ways to heal. Focus on the good in your life, like the things you mentioned. <3

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  2. I can't even imagine your pain, but I can promise you that it will get easier. Your nephew wouldn't want you to be consumed by heartache. Hang in there and just take it day by day.

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  3. You are in my thoughts and prayers. The loss of a loved one is really tough, and it is perfectly acceptable to grieve as long as you feel necessary (do we ever really stop grieving the loss of a loved on?). When times get rough just remember that you have the best guardian angel you could ask for looking down on you from above. I'm always an open ear if you need one.

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  4. I can't imagine the pain you are in my friend. I truly wish that I could make the pain go away or even dim it a bit. Loss is something that we all deal with on different levels, but I hope that you know that I am here for you in your time of need. They say time heals all wounds and I don't believe that is true, but I do believe that things get easier to deal with as we learn to cope. I will be praying for you and your family. I sincerely hope that this guy is punished to the fullest extent possible and that justice is served. I hope that you take the weekend to clear your mind and just know that day or night I am just a call, text, or snapchat away! LOVE YOU:)

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