Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Losing Someone You Love

I remember the call...I remember every detail about it. I was told my nephew was shot. I had hope that he was okay. Then I got another call. He was dead...from a gunshot wound. Do you know what it feels like to have your heart ripped from your chest? To be told one of the people in your life the means the most to you is gone. That hole is still there and will never be filled again. I do not have kids. I now do not want kids. My nephew was like my son. He was an amazing kid. 


He was a ball of energy. Always trying to see what he could get into. Starting something with his little sister. Farting on someone. Pushing the limit with you. He loved skrillex and was trying to make music on the computer. He was in band in middle school and played the drums. Video games was his passion. HE LOVED VIDEO GAMES. This kid was not perfect but he was to me! 



He was the ring bearer in my wedding. We carved pumpkins together. Put up the Christmas tree. I told him bad words that I shouldn't have and would give anything to hear them right now. I would give anything to cook this kid a steak. He loved steak and asked for it every time he came over to my house. I have so many fond memories with him that I will have to cherish as I can not make any new ones.  All I have is almost 13 years of his life. 


He will never get to get married, date a girl, or experience his life. He is gone. He was ripped from this world by a gun. By so much stupidity.   



Love your family..hug them. Do not let the little things bug you. You never know how long you have left with them. I wish I could go back and hug him one more time. I just want to hold him and hug him and tell him I love him. I can't. He was taken from me and all I have now are memories and pictures. 

Now on Friday I have to go say good bye to him. I will never see him again, hear his laugh or see his precious face! He was an angel and did not deserve what happened to him. I will never get to spend time with him or hug him. I would give anything to have him back and hug him one more time and tell him I love him! 





Dax Ian Dixon
12-18-2000 to 10-26-2013


21 comments:

  1. You already know I'm sending you love, hugs and prayers your way. You are like a sister to me and I cannot do anything from miles away but send you encouraging words of hope that the Lord will help you and your entire family with this process. You're an extremely strong individual and I have no doubt that you'll make it through this. I love you!!!

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  2. We will continue to be thinking about and praying for your family. You are family to me and I hate that you are going through this. You are so strong and I know you will make it through this incomprehensibly hard time! You will make it through this and Kelsey and I are here to help you in any way we can! LOVE YOU!!!

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  3. I am so so so sorry again, Rachel. Not sure the full details of the accident, but it sounds like an awful freak tragedy. Sometimes those are the worst to deal with because they don't make sense and they are so sudden. Hugs my friend to your family! And definitely sending prayers up!

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  4. Rachel this breaks my heart. I'm so sorry for your loss, this is something my heart can't fathom and you and your family are in my prayers. Know that you have the blogging community thinking of you and here for you for whatever you may need! Hang in there, Rachel...

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  5. I am so so sorry. what an awful tragedy. you and your family are in my thoughts.

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  6. Girl, so many prayers are lifted for you and your family right now.

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  7. I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful boy gone too soon. Praying for you and your family. I am sure my Grandmother, who loved children, was there to greet him in Heaven.

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  8. Praying so much for you and your family. You are all in my thoughts in this tough time♥

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  9. Rachel, I know that there are no words to take away your pain but I hope you find some comfort in knowing you are in the hearts and minds of many. I am so sorry for your loss.

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  10. I am so incredibly moved and upset by this news. I am so so sorry Rachel! My sincerest and deepest condolences to you and your family.

    "May choirs of angels lead him into paradise..."

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  11. Rachel, I'm so so sorry to hear about your nephew. I can't even imagine what you are going through right now. Praying for you and your family <3

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  12. I am so sorry Rachel! My heart goes out to your family..

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  13. I couldn't get through this post without crying like a baby. My heart is just broken for you and your family. You're in my thoughts and my prayers. I'm so so sorry this has happened to you and your family.

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  14. When i heard about this yesterday I put you guys in my thoughts and prayers. Reading this today I'm sitting here crying for a young boy I didn't know. This was beautifully written and I'm so sorry he was taken from you so soon. If there is anything I can do let me know.

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  15. omg I'm so sorry. My heart breaks for you and your family, I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

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  16. words cannot express how sorry i am for your loss. too soon. i am so sorry rachel.

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  17. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, Rachel.

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  18. nice photos!

    styleandchocolates.blogspot.com

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  19. My heart is in a thousand pieces for you and your family. I lost my father-in-law to a gun murder in 2010 and it was the most difficult thing I've ever gone through. My thoughts and prayers of strength and healing are with you.

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